Did you manage to catch the incredibly touching, yet sad story of Chris Picco who lost his wife and newborn son within days of each other? Thank you to those of you who have written in expressing how it helped you appreciate life more. In case you missed it you can read it here and I’m sure we all wish Chris well during this difficult time.
Today we have a very personal Breakthrough Experience from Daniel who is passionate about helping homeless kids after nearly becoming homeless himself. He shares his story, of how with the right support, he’s made significant changes in how he sees and overcomes his challenges.
Central to a lot of these changes has been his need to create a new future rather than letting his past hold him back, all whilst learning to seek help from others and his network.
While reading, reflect on these key questions for yourself:
- Where have past negative thoughts prevented you from taking progressive steps towards your goals and aspirations?
- Where do you tend to do everything yourself rather than reaching out to the people around you?
Letting Go of My Past to Build My Future
“I first heard of Lighthouse International in 2013 when I met Jatinder while doing a survey in a Starbucks in Piccadilly. It was a very challenging time for me, as I was just about to launch a social business and I was working very hard.
What made it even more challenging for me was some of the emotional baggage from my past which still remains. You see, a few years ago I was almost homeless and my biggest fear was losing everything.
It affected my daily life in many, many ways. Because of the fear of losing everything, I was actually scared of making money and having personal belongings in case I might lose it again!! It was easier just to not have it in the first place so that I could avoid the situation.
My other big challenge was that I was fiercely independent. I wanted to be a leader and do everything on my own.
After I met Jatinder, I began to realise that I had to deal with my challenges and not avoid them. I will never forget one statement he said to me, above all of them: “It’s not the problem, it’s how you react to it”. It helped me to realise that all my actions are based on my beliefs and that I needed to turn problems into solutions.
It’s been a long journey and I’m still healing. I have even clashed heads a few times with Jatinder on areas that had emotional charge for me. I wouldn’t say that I am completely over my past memories and I still have occasional nights when I get up at 3am in panic. However every day I take little steps that help me grow and develop. I am learning to trust my network including my family and friends who can help me. Jatinder and Lighthouse is a big part of this.
I learnt many lessons along the way including:
- Any hardship in life is the opportunity to start from scratch and to find your meaning and purpose in life.
- Change comes from the heart. Action comes from belief.
- I need to collaborate with others to make the impact I want on the world.
- Knowledge on its own is not enough. You need to take action and implement it through your life experience.
There is one statement in my life I will never forget that helps me on my journey when I feel like giving up:
ONE DAY… you will wake up in the morning and look in the mirror. You see a young person, full of energy and passion and ready to start adventures in life. ONE DAY… you will wake up in the morning and you see an older person, full of memories and adventures from the last decades. NOW THE QUESTION… what memories and adventures do you want to experience in your life TODAY?”
Daniel’s Breakthrough Lessons
By Jatinder Singh, Associate Partner, Mentorship Coach, Lighthouse International
1. The Crucial Importance of Addressing Our Gaps and Having the Courage to Ask for Help
This was a very challenging lesson for Daniel, given he saw asking for help and advice as a weakness. Think of the damage that ignoring a fundamental gap like this could have on the rest of our lives. If we ignored an infection and didn’t deal with it early enough, it could have very serious consequences for our health. That’s why we need to address our gaps as early as possible even though it can be uncomfortable at times. It can save a lot of pain and suffering down the line. Daniel felt leadership meant ‘doing everything yourself’, rather than looking for people that could help him in areas that he was weaker. As he began to see the negative impact this gap was having on his life and the extra stress it brought, Daniel became more open to seeking help from those that he had started to build trustworthy relationships with.
2. Letting Go of the Past
Daniel began to take action and understood that his past experiences were always hanging over him like a dark cloud. Everything he did was being impacted by his prior experiences. He recognised there was a significant gap in how he saw himself and his environment and that needed to change if he was to take positive steps forward and create a new future for himself. He also saw the consequences of not taking action; His past would equal his future. As a result he started to be proactive in learning lessons from his past and doing things differently.
If this story resonates with you and you’d like any guidance and solutions overcoming your biggest life, career or business challenges – just register to speak to a mentor on this page or get in touch with your Lighthouse Introducer.
Breakthrough image courtesy of Branewbs @ Flikr
Running man image courtesy of Hartwig HKD @ Flikr